Score: 2

"Grrrgh."

submission: is this fair?

date: April 30, 2005

This is insipid. Were it not for the "no promotion of unrelated web sites" rule I would want people to look at a couple of very informational sites concerning the real agenda and attitudes of PETA and activists like ColdPlay.

As it stands, however, the truth is not being told here. And therefore I cannot in good conscience give this animal liberation propaganda a good score.

Keep an open mind, peeps. Don't let their wool be pulled over your eyes. (And does anyone find it sad that the guy who reviewed before me goin' "LOL AMERICAN PIGS" is from the U.S. himself?)

Score: 9

"Makes a rather solid point about society."

submission: Like Jailbait?

date: December 2, 2004

A rather solid point concerning underage girls dressing to provoke erections. ... No pun intended. Agent Simms totally makes this one, adding style, humor, and irony to what would have otherwise been an uninteresting (yet very valid) social commentary.

Though the solution to this problem isn't all that apparent to me ...

Anyways, you done good, Walrus Man. Keep up the pace.

(Oy, and what's with these yahoos going "LOLZ AMERICANS SUK!!11" in the previous reviews? God, people'll find ANYTHING to bash Americans over ... Is anti-Americanism, like, the new cocaine or something?)

Score: 10

"... Wow."

submission: The Matrix Still Has You

date: September 27, 2004

"i subtracted points for actually linking to AOL in the first entry... what a horrible ISP... "

... Wow. Judging a movie by a mere hyperlink?

That's sad. Really sad.

Anyway, this was a great followup. I really loved this one, guys! The idea of combining series of Matrix-related shorts has intruiged me since the first one -- it's like a flavor pack of chewing gum! Keep it up, and don't mind the people who blast this for stupid reasons!

Score: 0

"Nope, not funny."

submission: 9/11 - 3 Years After CT

date: September 11, 2004

The fact that this butchered a lot of sacred cows put aside, this just was not funny at all. That's not a matter of 'taking the internet seriously,' it just wasn't funny. It's just another attempt at playing on people's feelings on 9/11 (whether it be sorrow, glee, or irritability over how much it's been covered by the cynicists, anti-Americans, and pro-Americans in Newgrounds), and in my opinion, a bad one at that.

Gotta give IAmVincent2 credit, though -- he managed to make a 9/11 tribute that was bigger than 1 MB in filesize.

As an aside, anyone else love how these anti-American losers are going "ahahahaha americans deserved it lol die u stupid fat ingorant yankees," when plenty of people from outher countries (e.g. U.K., Austrailia, Canada) were slaughtered in the attacks? I guess if an anti-American's own countrymen die in an attack on U.S. soil, it's perfectly okay as long as Americans die.

Retards.

Score: 7

"Ha ha ha! You wacky crazy bubbly fun guy! < / SaGa"

submission: Mr Toot-Toot - She Bangs!

date: February 27, 2004

That was perhaps THE MOST INSANE flash I've seen here in Newgrounds. I think it deserves to stay, just because of the mindfuck factor.

"I have a question for you... WOULD YOU LIKE TO EAT MY MUSHROOM?! ;D ;D ;D"

I'm still laughing. Dammit, I'M STILL LAUGHING!*$%^*!@$

Execution wise, this was pulled off very well. Props to your drawing abilities! The sound was also... well... very well suited.

So... yes. I've given it a five. Five five. Take a cigarette break, you desrrved it.

Score: 8

"Oh, YES! OH YES, MY SALMON HEADED FRIEND!"

submission: Ode to Cigarette

date: February 2, 2004

I gotta say, when I first saw this, I was expecting stick figures or a slideshow of posts and a rather immature attempt to shame the attention whore.

Damn, you proved me wrong, bro. Well done! I've briefly hung around Go-Gaia, so I understand where you came from on this - I think you captured the whole ... erm... style of Go-Gaia well there.

Love the way you did the characters and animation, too.

People wanting to expose idiots on forums, take note - this is how you do it!

Score: 6

"Amusing and a good entry for the file size."

submission: GOD - An IRC story

date: January 14, 2004

Interesting parody of the bible. I was amused by it, but I really do think you should have left out the stab at George Bush. Aside from being entirely out of context, it was uncalled for. I might not approve of the guy 100%, but I'm getting damn sick of seeing political/prejudiced "OMFG GEORGE BUSH === HITLAR AND OIL LOVAR!!! LOL AMERICANS SUCK" worm its way into EVERYTHING.

The Charles Manson thing may have also been a little extraneous, but I am not too sure there.

That brought my vote down to a 2. Had you left these out and came up with some more creative IRC/AOL Chatroom adaptions of the bible, it would have probably gotten a 4 from me.

That about covers it.

Score: 7

"Very funny!"

submission: When Frenchiez meet NG

date: November 24, 2003

I liked this flash movie. Though the graphics could use some work, the voice acting and ... er, "plot" of this movie more than made up for it. I didn't expect Strawberry Clock or the "BBBB" thing either!

Concerning the nationalist, prejudiced idiots who flamed your movie, yes, that was wrong and hateful of them. I think it'd bear justice to let you know that I'm an American - while I may not have agreed with the French government, I don't hate France or the French people. Hating and discriminating against a country and its people is wrong - as an American, I should know more than anyone else about what it's like to be hated by people because of your nation. :x

Anyway - good flash movie. Let's hope this one stays in the portal.

Score: 7

"This is a pretty good soundboard."

submission: Terminator 3 Soundboard

date: November 21, 2003

Soundboards seem to have become a fad among the portal goers, and that's resulted in some crappily done ones which've been voted low by me.

This one got a five, primarily because the opening text intro was rather hilarious and the actual soundboard was executed fairly well. The file size for this soundboard is also low compared to other soundboards I've seen, and yet despite the large amount of sounds available, it does not suffer from poor quality in sound.

There's not much I can say which would improve the soundboard - it's relatively small yet packs a lot of sounds, and is entertaining.

Good job!

Score: 5

"Superb animation and emulation of DBZ, however..."

submission: dbz thingy

date: November 18, 2003

Where's the beef?

I understand you wanted to show off your ability to draw and animate, but seriously... there's nothing to this other than the animation. While I have to say that your skills are pretty awesome in that area, the Portal is meant more for complete animations and games.

However, I would like to see you use your skills to make a flash animation! Get a storyboard going, animate the scenes, get some sound (though if you have good textual storytelling, sound would be less important), and you could very damn well have some top 50-worthy animations.

So until then, keep rocking!