All 11 game Reviews


Like Jailbait? Like Jailbait?

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars

Makes a rather solid point about society.

A rather solid point concerning underage girls dressing to provoke erections. ... No pun intended. Agent Simms totally makes this one, adding style, humor, and irony to what would have otherwise been an uninteresting (yet very valid) social commentary.

Though the solution to this problem isn't all that apparent to me ...

Anyways, you done good, Walrus Man. Keep up the pace.

(Oy, and what's with these yahoos going "LOLZ AMERICANS SUK!!11" in the previous reviews? God, people'll find ANYTHING to bash Americans over ... Is anti-Americanism, like, the new cocaine or something?)


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Terminator 3 Soundboard Terminator 3 Soundboard

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

This is a pretty good soundboard.

Soundboards seem to have become a fad among the portal goers, and that's resulted in some crappily done ones which've been voted low by me.

This one got a five, primarily because the opening text intro was rather hilarious and the actual soundboard was executed fairly well. The file size for this soundboard is also low compared to other soundboards I've seen, and yet despite the large amount of sounds available, it does not suffer from poor quality in sound.

There's not much I can say which would improve the soundboard - it's relatively small yet packs a lot of sounds, and is entertaining.

Good job!



The maze of Doom The maze of Doom

Rated 3 / 5 stars

This was good, but...

FINISH THE FREAKING MAZE! :D

Seriously. This has a lot of fun potential, but you really ought to finish your stuff before you upload it to the portal. People probably aren't going to accept another Maze of Doom, v. 2. After all, NG's FAQ says not to do that.

So really... I'm not being harsh here, but you've got one chance with a movie to upload it in a complete fashion. If you upload another slightly changed movie, people will blam your ass off for spamming the Portal with teensily revised movies.

And if you upload a half-baked flash movie and intend to finish it later through updating the same entry, then you've missed out on getting a better score, because people will not like the unifnished product as much as they would the finished product - meaning, that you could have gotten a lot of 5's and 4's on this where people have either blammed or voted low.

Anyway, that's just my rant. Go ahead and finish this anyway, because it's got lots of potential.

And next time, upload complete movies! :D



Space Adventure Space Adventure

Rated 2.5 / 5 stars

Well...

It's a start. You've got the base idea for an enjoyable game, although there's been a few like this on NG already.

My critiques:

Make a preloader for this game. It starts off prematurely while the game is still loading, and for 56k modem users, that's bad.

Second - make a "you lose" screen or something to signify the difference of making it to the end and losing all your ships' health. You get the same screen regardless.

Third - See if you can add some sound effects. It would sure liven this game up - just be sure to watch the file size. Make sure the files have decent compression.

Fourth - GRAAAPHICS. This game needs some freakin' eye candy! Given the way this game was built, I don't think it'd be too hard to go back and modify your symbols and improve the graphics. Instead of brown blocks of mystery, why not metal doors, or space station walls, or something? A space type background, and a better detailed ship?

On the whole though, this is a good start. Keep going!



Just Drive Baby Just Drive Baby

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

A simple, enjoyable game!

This reminds me of those early games, and also of the DOS GCS stuff like ZZT and Megazeux. The controls are not that hard to get used to, though getting "a feel" for what the car is going to do takes a few seconds.

There's some pretty good challenge in this. It's a challenge to drive and avoid the obstacles (I got past the first screen on 10 health ... )

My only suggestion - see if you can crank the FPS up to 30 or 60 without a drastic change in file size. I don't think the file size will bloat from an FPS change, but having a higher frame rate will make the gameplay smoother.

Alrighty! That's all I've got for ya. Keep goin'.



Experiment of Sound Experiment of Sound

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

I liked it, but...

I don't know if it's going to survive portal entry. I gave it a 5, but it had a bad score when I saw the results.

It's an interesting toy at the most, reminiscent of the stuff that was (is?) at the Requiem for a Dream movie page. If you make a revised version of this, you ought to view that web page and see what kind of things they have there in order to make your experiment more interesting.

As it stands, this is all plain shapes and colors when it comes to graphics, but the sound factor and the way the graphics also change when the mouse moves around makes for an interesting timesink.


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Orgasm-Lucifer responds:

Thank you for the review, Yes i definetely see the connection you pointed out, i think its slso similar the david lynch's website
as far as graphics, those were merely garnish, i wanted to put emphasis on sound, my original work was just a blank red screen with the sound hotspots that moved and changed, i needed something at least a little more visiual to get through the portal.


Black Sonic Bonus Black Sonic Bonus

Rated 2.5 / 5 stars

Not that bad of a Sonic adaption.

It could use a lot better graphics though. I'm not sure if you could do anything to mix it up, such as hazards (or even a way to fail) ... but as it stands, the current entry is an amusing waste of time.

Not bad work - keep crackin'!



16-Bit retro shooter 16-Bit retro shooter

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

Nice demo!

A compact download, and it's not too shabby of a game, putting aside the fact it's a demo.

I know it's a 1942/1943 ripoff, but hey. This isn't a bad emulation or... er... thing of it.

I would suggest trying to make your own 16-bit eraish sprites, just to make this game as original as you can get it. The powerups ought to be done in sprites too, they seem slightly out of place as flash circles (though I'm guessing you already have planned to change this).

I'd also like to see some more powerups if possible.

Overall, nice demo! Keep crackin'!


Ryaareet2000 responds:

Yeah there is quite a way to go. I wanted to try to get an engine working for a shooter then, as you say, slot in my own graphics. I used the dambusters theme as that is the game I plan on turning it into. Fight though waves of german aircraft to blow up the damn at the end of each level.


Dodge 3.0 Dodge 3.0

Rated 2.5 / 5 stars

5... 5... 5555555!! < / Sir Hawkeye >

Not a bad idea for a game. My one true complaint is... When you click to start the game, since your character is set to follow the mouse, well...

... Your character winds up on top of the balls you were supposed to avoid, so you get an insta-gameover.

I would suggest fixing that.

Otherwise, this is not that bad a game for a beginner!



dress chibi vegeta clock! dress chibi vegeta clock!

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

Okay, that just rules.

Vegeta with a beer, cig and afro.


Funny as hell.


As far as suggestions... Yeah, the props need to be a bit more detailed; it looks a tad displaced with a fairly well drawn Vegeta, and then ... er... 'interestingly' drawn props.


Otherwise, *thumbs up*